When it comes to divorce, attorneys have done it all and seen it all. They can offer you the best guidance and information as you prepare for this new experience that will ultimately lead to you starting your life over. Ending a marriage is never an easy thing to do. Emotionally, you can feel overwhelmed and struggle to keep up with every detail of the separation including distributing assets. That’s why it’s smart to have professionals oversee these matters.
Another reason you want to work with an attorney as quickly as possible in divorce matters is because you need time to go over the details of the divorce and what you will want. For example, if you have children, you not only will want to make a decision on custody, but financial support for the children.
You should have an attorney in mind before you speak to your partner about divorce. Why is that? When you do talk to your partner and tell them that you want to end the marriage, you need to have facts, not speculation, especially if they are against the idea. You want to know what it will cost you, what the law says and any other variables you should be aware of.
Attorney Tips On Divorce
Speaking with a lawyer sooner rather than later is smart. Another smart idea is to focus your time on what you need to do to get your life restarted. This is not only important for you emotionally, but it could be vital to getting custody of your children if you are relocating and need to show that you can provide them with a stable and safe home. Here are some other tips to consider:
- Work with an attorney early: Not only would it benefit you to know what to expect from a divorce, before you get divorced, but an attorney can also tell you what not to say when speaking with your ex. Avoiding sensitive topics or giving them information they do not need to know, especially before the agreements are reached.
- Yes, it needs to be in writing: It doesn’t matter how great you and your ex get along. If you are getting divorced you need everything to be in writing.
- Try not to be petty: Do not use this time to try and hurt them or get back at them. Let them win some disputes for the sake of keeping things moving forward.
- Stay off social media: Right now is not the time to be emotional. You need to focus on the process and getting your life restarted. Social media only brings headaches and issues after a divorce so give it a break for a bit.
- Focus on your life: It doesn’t matter if you have to find a new place or are staying put, dedicate your energy to your life and what you need to do to get going. Maybe it’s to get a job, start some new hobbies or something else.
- There’s always modifications: Divorce agreements can and will change over the years. Modifications allow you to make these changes on anything that’s agreed to in the original document. That’s why it’s not only smart to not try and win every little battle but to also get everything in writing.
- Divorce is harder on kids: If you have children you need to remember that this divorce is going to be harder on them than it is you. That’s why you need to talk to them about the separation and make sure to give them space if that’s what they want.
- Get a therapist: It is highly recommended that anyone getting a divorce speak to a therapist. Not only is this a good idea to do before making the decision, but after the decision has been made. This will give you some added clarity and guidance on what steps are best for you to take.
- Talk to experts: Therapists, accountants, realtors and attorneys are just some of the experts you should talk too before making decisions. Should you sell the house you got in a divorce? Talk to a realtor and your accountant first. Should you move your kids to the other side of town, forcing a change in their school as well? Talk to the therapist first about the idea.
Getting information and guidance from experts is always a smart idea, especially if you are not sure what direction to move forward. Their experience can offer a great benefit to you as well as give you different things to think about.
Areas You Need To Focus On
Finance, real estate, emotional and physical health and more need to be focused on right now. There are so many areas to cover and you really need to dedicate time to each one until it is resolved. Real estate is just as important an area to focus on as going to the gym or for a long run. Why? You need a place to live and if you have kids, they need a place to live as well. Putting off major responsibilities because of your divorce just creates a deeper hole you have to get out of.
Don’t Expect Gratitude From Your Ex
Allowing your ex to win a couple of battles is smart strategy. However, you should never expect gratitude from them. Remember, even if you feel that you are in the right for wanting this separation, they may disagree and furthermore, they may also disagree with the benefits you are receiving. This process goes smoothly if you have less resistance from your ex which is why letting them win some battles is smart.
Making Smart Decisions
What does your attorney think of your idea of getting divorced? Don’t have one? Then that’s the first thing you need to address. Right now you should have more questions than answers, and those questions should only be answered by experienced professionals including lawyers and therapists. Get the answers first and then make decisions.