Did your schedule change recently? Are you now having to go into work later meaning you have to be out later? That hour or two difference may not seem like much to an employer, but it can make a world of difference on your schedule. You get your kids during the week and your former spouse gets them on the weekends. This arrangement was set up because you got out of work at a time that allowed you to get the kids from school. Now your work schedule is changing which means a lot more will have to change as well.
Parenting time, in matters of a divorce, can be managed between the parents. However, when there is a disagreement on when the children should be with a specific parent, the courts can step in and make the decision for you. These agreements are made based on what the court feels is best for the children. Any changes to this agreement or others made involving custody, if they will involve the courts, need to be handled by your legal representation.
Reasons To Adjust Parenting Time
A large percentage of people who make their first parenting time agreement this year will need to have it changed in some way by next year. That’s because of a variety of reasons. Some of the more common ones that are discussed include one parent moving away, one parent not being responsible enough, changes to job or schedule that impact the original agreement, changes in income or health and more.
If you have a good reason to have the agreement changed and the other partner agrees with it, then things can be handled quickly and simply. However, if the former partner is not happy with the requested changes, you could have to take the matter to court. That means you need to have more than reasons, you need to have a plan.
Talking With Your Former Spouse
Every former couple is different. Hopefully, especially because you have children, you can have a good conversation with your former spouse and have it remain friendly. However, there are situations, especially when it comes to custody, where this conversation will not go friendly and it should be handled instead by an attorney.
If you feel that you cannot talk with your former partner about this, you should not try to push the matter. Speak with an attorney and determine the best and safest way to present the information. If it’s a major change you may want to talk to the other parent before notifying the courts, but allow your attorney to advise you on that.
Do You Need An Attorney
Yes, because you have legal questions. When speaking with a family law attorney regarding parenting time, you are going to have the option of receiving a free consultation. This is where you will meet with the attorney, either in person or over the phone, and tell them about your situation, what information you have and also any questions you have.
Attorneys utilize these consultations to learn about your situation and determine if you are a good fit for them as a client. This is a great opportunity for you to get free information and guidance about your situation and have a strategy in place before making a decision on starting with legal help.
When To Talk To An Attorney
Before you speak to your former spouse about any changes you need to speak with an attorney, especially if you feel that they are going to make it difficult to have those changes made. If you cannot communicate with them without a fight breaking out, or they are unresponsive, then the easiest thing to do, and the best way to protect yourself is to reach out to a lawyer first.
The other parent has to be notified of any changes made in the agreement and if you do not do it, the courts will. That’s fine and it does not mean that you cannot talk to them. However, if you want to make sure that the matter gets handled and you do not want to be involved, your legal team can handle the process.
Get It In Writing
Anything you and your partner agree on needs to be in writing. It does not matter what they say, it does not matter what type of relationship you still have with them and it certainly does not matter what they promise you. If you want to count on it, it needs to be in writing and it needs to be addressed by your legal team.
Why would your partner be fine giving you the deal you want but would not want to have any legal representation involved? That does not make a lot of sense and it’s one of the most common mistakes people fall for in these situations. The original parenting time agreement was made years ago but since then you and your former spouse have made major changes to it, just never on paper. That’s fine but if they are starting to take advantage of your kindness, these documents will keep them in line. That’s what they are there for and why you need anything you agree to, to be in writing.
It’s Not Just About You
Parenting time can be a battle. Even if the request you are making would be beneficial for your children, it still may be an unpopular decision. As difficult as it is to admit, there are no winners in these matters because the children are impacted the most. Make sure that you are doing everything you can to resolve this matter calmly and do not make it an issue around your kids.